Day #77: Pretty.

I realised myself, changed a bit. I want to be pretty. I mind my own dressing. I want to be pretty because of you. I see myself in the mirror, in a dress. Pink one. So unbelievable. But deep inside, I was hoping you will see that. I know it wont happen anymore. Im just dreaming big, real big. It really bothers me when you dont talk to me. After so many weeks, i found out that, you text me only when you see me. Probably you're just feeling bad? I dont know. But it hurts me. HAha. Funny huh? Its okay. Replacement, forever one. I still remember you sent me a picture, "It is so lucky to find someone that you will not want to say goodbye to." I still have that picture in my phone. Goodbye.. Hahaha. You've said it so many times. I dont know whether you mean it or not, but definitely, im still suffering from your ignorance now. I really dont understand myself, why do i have to care so much? Somehow, the feelings, i really couldnt get rid of it. It might be easy for you, for anyone else, but if you really put yourself in my situation, you will understand why i cant get over you. The feelings, the promises, the words, the hugs, everything, that related to you. Recently, i kept listening to Distance by Christina Perri. A sentence from the song, "Make sure, keep my distance say i love you, youre not listening." So true. I kept wishing you night, saying how much i need you on my blog, twitter, but youre not listening, at all. I kept the distance. Until i have the guts to wish you night, as usual, being ignored. Is it something i have to take it as a habit already? I dont want, thats why it still hurts. According to a post on tumblr, The word "Loved" does not exist. Love doesnt have a past tense. Thats why you cant stop loving. If you stop loving, means you did not love at first. Seems right to me, but somehow, its just weird. I dont know. One thing, for sure, I did not fall out of love with you. When i say i love you, i wasnt lying, i mean it. I mean every word i said. Goodnight, love one.