Day #128: Blue Monday.

Blue is the color representing unhappy. I really tried my best to make things right, but it always ended up the other way. And I always regret doing it when the others dont even care. Why do i have to think so much? Why cant i be independent? Is it that hard? I tried really hard to get things out of my mind at least a while to let me study properly for the test, but it just didnt turn out that way too. I laughed, I smiled, I tried. But deep inside me, I dont feel good. I dont know how to describe or express myself. I really dont know. I've reached a point that i want to give up everything. Please, tell me what to do. Everyone keeps telling me to be strong, how to do? Being strong is not as easy as how you say it. Everyone knows. I dont need pity. Neither sympathy. Sometimes i rather to be on my own. I know myself, i tend to lose confident and care about what everyone says. I mean EVERYONE. People always say its a good experience even after break up. But you know, the pain that i had is more than the happiness i had. I gave my best to do everything, but it turns out really sucky, though i know no one cares.