Everything i want to tell, i cant fit any of it in the card, and just hoping you'll read this. I dont want to be just friends. Everything i did, it's because i trusted you, i trusted my ability to change things. I dont believe in destiny, neither fate. But i believe in feelings. The feelings that i have, which never fade, i believe in them. I didnt expect myself to fall in love so hard, I really did not. You always wanted me to hate you, i dont know why. Despite everything you did, I never hate you. Telling truth, i was mad, i was hurt, i was lost, I just couldnt hate you. Maybe you didnt know, but im really not an ordinary girl that you know outside. How much effort i put through to make you awake, to make you stand up. All i get was just, "Let me go". That feeling, i feel like jumping down the building, and stab myself at the heart before jumping down. Before today, I told myself, never cry. Dont cry in front of anyone. Anything, just try your best to smile. I smiled and smiled. But i really cant take it anymore. How long more i still have to pretend to be okay. Everyone asks me to not think, it will be okay. How will it be okay? When you know everything is going to the wrong way. I know every decision has no right or wrong. We have our own perception. You made your choice cause you think it's right. Fine. But why didnt you want me to go through with you and take it all to yourself? Do you know the heartache when you're trying to pretend you're okay in front of me? In front of me, you have to pretend? I dont want to let you go. I dont want, but do i even have the chance to choose? Why am i not given any chance to choose and you're deciding everything? Im not satisfy at all. Not even a little.
No comments:
Post a Comment