Day #89: Honest.

Am i being honest to myself? Was i trying to find another excuse to cover myself? I really dont know. I hope im not lying to myself anymore. Yung, you have to always remember, this guy left you. He doesnt worth a single thing you do. Not to cry for him anymore. Dont need to care for him anymore. Please remember that. You were once a replacement, now, you're just a trash by the roadside. Its okay. No matter whats wrong, you did your best to save everything you can, he didnt appreciate, its okay. You know you're stronger than you thought. You are, yung. No one will understand your pain, cause they are not you. You understand yourself. Your friends were trying to help you. Whether it helps, at least you tried. He's not brave to fight for you, nevermind, you must be brave enough to walk out his shadow. You've gone through a lot that no one can ever imagine. People think its easy, its okay, not their fault. You, yourself should know how hard it is. Behind every bright smile, there is a hidden secret. So, dont ever judge a person when you dont even know what she went through. The second he chose her, you should know, everything was arranged. Even it wasnt, but it is, after you know about his family, his background. You must not keep asking question. Just leave it untold. If he cares, he would ask. Yes, you know how scary it was, how afraid you were when the conical flask was on fire. But it's okay, dont show it to anyone. You're strong and grown up girl. You dont need anyone's help. You dont need, yung. Be honest to yourself. Goodnight, love.